I took my 13-year-old daughter and friend to see “Thirteen” at Scotts Valley High. The students in the show were delightful, but the show itself not.
It started out promising. But rather than explore the various upsets and commonality of adolescence, it was the same old thing: protagonist must decide between being popular or true to his outcast friends, boys want to make out, girls fight over a boy.
I felt bad for my girls, once again watching themselves portrayed in such shallow, superficial terms. Ironic, when you consider that adolescence is the time when most of us begin to take on the big questions.
This show was so fraught with stereotypes, and these stereotypes were so condoned, they were actually listed in the program — like “goth” and “loser.”
The boy had male friends backing him up, the girl had a back-stabbing friend. He could manipulate the situation to “get some tongue,” but the girl’s best friend was bad when she manipulated. Each kid was labeled and assigned a group, “loser,” by default.
How can we teach our children not to stereotype others when we constantly stereotype them? How can we encourage them to “be themselves” when that character is always portrayed as the loser?
The 13-year-olds I know — real 13-year-olds — are funny, insightful, sensitive and supportive of one another. Girls have varied interests, from sports to drama. Boys are friends with the girls and actually see them as humans. Women have strong bonds with other women, like to be together and support one another in various endeavors.
Would adults stand for this dumbing-down of themselves? Would the high school permit a show that so stereotyped a race or nationality?
Please excuse my complaining, but as they say in “Thirteen,” Jews are always complaining.
I would say, rather than review the show yourself, have your daughter review it. I asked my brothers' friends how accurate it was, and they said that it was very similar to their own middle school experiences - and they're between the ages of 11 and 13. Though the characters, to an older audience, act like 16-18 year olds, they are truly acting like modern middle school kids. They are undergoing what one study once referred to as the "Lolita Effect" - they seem to be getting more socially (and sexually?) active at a younger age.
And I feel that is the point that the writers of the show intended to make. Every theatrical performance - a musical or not- is a stance about something, be it political like in "RENT", or a social problem as even expressed in "SEUSSICAL: THE MUSICAL". "13" could just as easily be saying that kids are growing up too fast. They need to slow down, after all they do have a life ahead of them. They are cracking under the norms instilled by the media and their peers to be perfect, to have the best party, in the best ballroom at the best hotel... which just may be the Best Western.
After all, as in the closing number of the show, kids just need a little less pressure, and a little more time. They're trying to follow, they're trying to lead, trying to find what is true... and we all have a little more homework to do.
I would be curious as to how your daughter reacted to the show, prior to hearing of your disappointment as to how it handled these themes. My own kids (12 and 10) seemed able to take the positive message (don't let yourself get bullied or pressured into bad behavior) in stride. None of the characters in the play struck them as being role models.